CHUCK NORRIS sucks balls. Last week, he was seen endorsing Republican Presidential nominee Mike Huckabee and making an ass of himself, when he called out John McCain. Now I’m no supporter of McCain or anything he’s a part of, but I DO know that he has actually seen war, been held in captivity and tortured unlike the current President (who sends working-class people to war) and Chuck Norris (who makes movies about killing poor Brown people). Look at this square-bear:
There is nothing worse than a dude like Chuck making stupid loot off of Asian culture while people like Bruce Lee who are MASTERS of the sh*t, invent a television series (“Kung Fu“) and have their part given to a white dude (David Carridine). I have hated this culture vulture ever since I saw my first Bruce Lee movie. If you’ve never seen “Return of the Dragon,” then peep this clip and overstand me (the best part is when he blows the chest-hair out of his hand…LOL):
And here is Conan O’Brien with one of the most HILARIOUS bits I have EVER seen on television in my whole life (slavename and thecheddarbox feels me).
At least Bruce Lee killed Chuck on-screen before he died. =)
Senbei
p.s. John McCain IS HELLA OLD though.
p.p.s. “American Ninja,” was actually a real movie. Cultural commodification does NOT go. =(

4 comments
February 7, 2008 at 5:53 pm
G-Mitch
Bruce, throwin them haymakers knockin muhfuckas out somethin crazy. All them cracks of necks and knuckles. I love the cat too. That music right after he breaks dudes neck has to be used in a rap if it already hasn’t. Hot Fiah. The Walker Texas Ranger Lever Goes Hard and so does Conan. I could do without Chuck Norris being alive though.
Peace.
February 8, 2008 at 9:35 am
colinresponse
Despite my hatred of his appropriation of Asian culture, I wish I had a Walker Texas Ranger lever…that would go so hard.
Wanna know some crazy sh*t? I just found out that Chuck Norris is 1/4 Cherokee Native American! Wut the wizzle? He is definitely NOT reppin’ 4 the indigenous folk.
C
p.s. Bruce Lee haymakers make me feel warm inside.
February 11, 2008 at 3:57 pm
j.millz
so…3 to 1, 40 is the new 120. chuck norris was and will always be a chode. (i don’t even know what chode means but i bet it ages 3 to 1 and i bet it looks like chuck norris)
bruce lee is the ILLEST by the way.
February 11, 2008 at 5:19 pm
colinresponse
daaahahahaha! a chode is a penis silly. u got it right tho. chuck norris = chode.