(This is written as part of the Youth Media Blog-a-thon, sponsored by Youth Outlook and WireTap.)

[Yes We Did]

THE SWEET:
My President is Black. This is the first time in my life that I have ever referred to a President as my President, as well as the first time I have ever felt it necessary to state the race of my President (wow, I did it again). President Barack Hussein Obama is giving Georger Walker Bush 2 months to pack his sh*t and get the f*ck up out.

[It's been a LONG time comin'...]

I spent the night celebrating with my partner and our friends at our home, then in Berkeley on Telegraph Ave. and lastly on Broadway in Oakland, CA. It was difficult at times for me to put into words the feelings that were sweeping through me. In the beginning, Obama’s victory felt a bit anti-climactic to me. I had just returned from school, heard my partner scream her head off and ran into the room to see that CNN had projected Barack Obama the winner of the 2008 Presidential Election. What followed next was a building feeling of joy and euphoria I hadn’t felt in the presence of that elusive ninja named sobriety since my wedding or my childhood.

I drove from Berkeley to Oakland with the windows down, listening to Nas’ “Black President” in the homey’s ride, screaming at the top of my lungs in the most honest of voices. It was the sound of month after month of anxiety at the thought of a McCain/Palin Presidency in this day and age, after 8 years of the worst “leader,” to have ever graced the Oval Office. I had the repeat feeling of losing my breath and recalling how hard I have been working for the last 8 years, at bettering myself and the world around me. I recalled all the time spent working for my own liberation from fear, anger, self-hatred, my own oppressor patterns, my own internalized oppression, and all of these fore mentioned shortcomings in the lives of others. It was as if the world showed me that there was still some sense that integrity, truth and hard work, despite blatant injustice could still make a difference in the country I was just about ready to give up on (Yo, I know I sound all starry-eyed, muhf*cka! – this is the “sweet” section – don’t f*cking worry, the “bitter” is for the end. Let me speak my piece on this happiness for one second gotdemmit!!!)*.

*NOTE: This statement comes from years and years of people telling me how “easy” my life is despite a plethora of personal despair and hopelessness in my life, the lives of loved ones around me, and the fact that when I try to combat this hopelessness, many people have called me falsely optimistic due to how “easy” my life is, thus sending me back down into hopelessness. It’s my own sh*t that I’m working on, so please pay it no mind. In other words, “it’s not you, it’s me.” =P Back to our story…

One of the best moments of this night was standing next to my brother from another mother who is of mixed Black/African heritage, while a group of Anglo UC Berkeley students yelled: “U-S-A! U-S-A!”. He looked at me and we both had a sh*t-eating grin. Now keep in mind, this brother is one of the most intelligent, educated, Afrocentric cats I know. He looks at me straight in the eye and says: “F*ck it… U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A!” =P I almost died right there on Telegraph and Durant, I sh*t you not.

[Berkeley...How do I Love/Loathe Thee?]

I wokeup this morning dehydrated, with a pounding headache and the feeling that the weight on my shoulders felt just a little bit lighter. And then…it hit me.

THE BITTER:
1. President Obama has been handed a muhf*ckin sh*tstorm of a situation from George Bush Jr. It will be up to Obama to fix a broken economy, change to tide of two mistaken, illegal wars in Iraq and Afghanistan, protect the rights of women and a will face myriad other obstacles in these next 4 years. I/we now must work harder than ever to think of creative new ways to make this country and world a better place to live in. This becomes increasingly difficult because of the sheer fact that while Obama may want to change the world and the country, he is now essentially the leader of Capitalism. Now I am not going to go into one of my raves here as these words are on the internet and I am hoping to avoid blacklists of any kind (if I am not already on some), but within Capitalism there will always be a need for a subordinate segment of our economy. There will ALWAYS be a necessity for an oppressed people, and keep in mind: even if EVERY single socioeconomic class had equal representation in regards to race, there would still be a group of people with little to zero access to higher education, healthcare, true freedom, peace of mind and the pursuit of happiness. In other words, “it’s not Obama that’ll only go so far, it’s the muhf*ckin system…”

2. PROPOSITION h(8)te passed narrowly, 52% to 48% in California…
When I heard this news, it felt like someone deflated my Obamadaimean-Happiness-Hot-Air-Go-Balloon. When I got to school this morning and saw one of my Queer homeboys, he looked at me and said “what’s up Colin…Thank God McCain didn’t win, but I feel like someone just punched me in the f*cking face…” I felt my heart drop, looked at the ring on my finger and for some reason felt like it was somehow my fault that this sh*t had happened (yes, just as “white-guilt” exists, so does “hetero-guilt.” Who knew? I suppose I did). I DO believe however, that this sh*t will not stand for long. Even if ignorant, hateful, scurryass people are allowed to use confusing wording in election ballots to play on people’s shortcomings in order to marginalize people who make them feel “icky,” there is only so long in this country that people will be allowed to get away with such ludicrous, despicable shenannigans. Apparently, there are Civil Rights groups already hard at work to protest the ban on Gay marriage in California. It has become apparent that although we had a record number of young adult and/or people of color come out to vote this year, the majority of these new voters had enough internalized homophobia and heterosexism to f*ck up the lives of people who already have enough bullsh*t to deal with as it is. *SIGH*

THE SYMPHONY:
I have to admit, I was moved a little bit by the words of John McCain upon losing to Barack Obama. He could have done very much to divide the United States even more than it already is, throwing fuel on the fire of mistrust and hatred of Obama by the base of the Republican party, but he didn’t. I realize fully that this is what he was supposed to do, but he didn’t HAVE to, and there are many in his party who didn’t want him to. It was the first time since 2000 when he ran against Bush Jr. that I ever saw him act like a “Maverick.” You aint dead yet Senator McCain, but I honestly hope that you rest in peace, until you rest in peace. Funny how things work out, right?

["My President is Black..."]

[Pt. 1]

[Pt. 2]

[Pt. 3]

[via MassMovementTV]

Let’s get to f*cking work y’all,
COLINRESPONSE

p.s.

["That's Life..."]

p.p.s.
Michelle Obama is the finest 1st Lady there ever was.